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 Sarah Chalke QuotationMovie Title: I've Been Waiting for You (1998) as Sarah Zoltanne: Eric Garrett : Speaking of parties, I'm having one and we'd like to invite you as the official guest of honor. Sarah Zoltanne : Why? So you and your little "descendants club" can burn me at the stake and roast marshmallows by the fire? Sarah Zoltanne : Did you know smoking causes wrinkles? Kyra : Where have you guys been? Sarah Zoltanne : Oh, making out, lip-locking, tongue wrestling. The usual. Kyra : Very funny. Sarah Zoltanne : Garlic is for vampires! Just ask Buffy! Doesn't anyone in this school watch television? Ted Rankin : I know you are having a few adjustment problems. Sarah Zoltanne : Adjustment problems? Not getting picked for the prom committe, that's an adjustment problem! Movie Title: Scrubs (2001) as Elliot: Chris Turk : Ya know Elliot, eventually you're gonna have to take off your sock. Elliot : If I do then from now on whenever you guys look at me all you're going to think is Giant Gross-Foot. It's like that security guard with the hook for the hand, all anybody thinks when they look at him is Big Giant Afro. Nurse Carla Espinosa : [gasps] I do think that! [To Jordan] Elliot : I doubt sex for you is about making babies, because you'd probably just eat them anyway, and driving over to Dr. Cox's place and pleasuring him while he watches sports hardly counts as revenge. Elliot : Dr. Cox! Dr. Cox : I'm hoping for your sake there's another Dr. Cox sitting right behind me. Elliot : I'm not sure what you were trying to teach me by sending me to Dr. Kelso. Dr. Cox : The value, and this is important, of leaving me alone. Elliot : I think we both know there's a little more to it than that. Dr. Cox : No, trust me, there's not. Listen, missie, I want you to spread the word. I've... had... enough! The next whiney intern coming to me for a cookie and a hug, I swear to Aïsha, I'm going to hurt! [Dr. Cox jumps over the couch] Dr. Cox : And you, you one-man freakshow, take your blah-blah to the blah-blah-psychologist, because if you are so stupid to confront the chief of medicine over some quasi-offensive endearment, then you've just gotta go ahead and change the captain of your brainship, because he's drunk at the wheel. Elliot : You're right, you're absolutely right. I have to learn to pick my battles. Thank you so much. [Elliot leaves the room] Dr. Cox : Y... you're welcome. [Elliot keeps talking at a patient with a wired jaw] Nurse: Did somebody here buzz for a nurse? Elliot : No. Nurse: [Looking at the patient] It looks like his eyes are screaming... Elliot : Do you want to be alone? John Dorian : No. Elliot : Do you want to cry a little? John Dorian : No. Elliot : Wanna go throw stuff off the roof like Letterman used to do? [Elliot and JD are about to bungee jump, and JD is very nervous] Elliot : Come on, what's the worst that could happen? J.D. : We could die. [Elliot can't find an apartment] Nurse Carla Espinosa : How you doing? Elliot : I'm exhausted. I mean, I'm just one person. At least Turk has you to pick up the slack when it gets too bad. Nurse Carla Espinosa : You'd think so. [Elliot's cell phone rings but she ignores it] Nurse Carla Espinosa : Aren't you gonna answer that? Elliot : Nah, that's just Todd. He keeps calling me and asking if I want to move into his pants. Todd : [to J.D., about Elliot] So, what are her breasts like? Elliot : Todd, I'm right here. Todd : Oh, sorry... So, what are your breast like? Elliot : C'mon peeps, let's go kick some sick patient ass. [JD turns to Turk and Carla] J.D. : And that my friends is one nerdy honky. [Turk to Carla] Chris Turk : That's two. Elliot : Mr. Bragen, it is so great to see you back in the hospital. Mr. Bragen : Woo-hoo. I've got a tube in my penis. Elliot : Dr. Cox! Dr. Cox : And there you are! Elliot : Huh? Dr. Cox : I was just now wondering if there was anything that could actually push my headache into a full blown migraine... and there you are. Paul Flowers : Sometimes it feels like you're holding back. Elliot : Of course I'm holding back, I'm insane you idiot. Remember the other day when you told me I had pit-stains, well I have cried every fifteen minutes on the half-hour since you told me that. I am racked with self-doubt, I have panic attacks, I'm claustrophobic, germ-phobic, phobia-phobic. I talk to myself, I talk to my cats, I talk to three separate shrinks about the fact that often my cats respond to me in my mother's voice and, yesterday, when that stupid, pretty surgical nurse handed you a pair of latex gloves I almost killed the guy who's leg I was stitching up because I couldn't stop thinking about the two of you having sex on a box of steaks. Why a box of steaks? 'Cos my Dad had an affair with a female butcher and, as I mentioned before, I am insane. There, I opened up, are you happy? [Turk is talking about a rival surgeon] Turk: Bonnie is killing me; I'm telling you, I cannot beat this woman no matter what I try. She's like a ninja but worse. J.D. : Nothing's worse than a ninja - they're masters of every style of combat. Carla : Can we please talk about something other than Bonnie? Elliot : [to Turk] I think you should give Bonnie a break. You know, it's really hard being a woman around here... you can walk through walls and nobody notices you. J.D. : Not entirely unlike a... ninja. [To J.D. and Elliot] Dr. Cox : Ah, damn. I missed the annual sleep-over, didn't I? That wonderful time of the year when you two crazy kids throw all caution to the wind and make sweet, ellbowy love to each other. Don't you be shy. You can tell Uncle Coxy about the naughtay. Elliot : Dr. Cox, I lost my apartment and I was just needing a place to stay... Dr. Cox : ...so you went over to your friend's house and cried on his shoulder - boo-hoo-wah - and you of course comforted her because she was weak and vulnerable and blah, blah, blah, nerdy sex, the end. Dear lord, Laverne, how in God's name do you listen to this crap all day long? Nurse Roberts : Are you kidding? If he turns out to be her brother, this is better than my stories. Elliot : Position one, two or three? J.D. : We only had two. Elliot : Oh yeah. Then I have to show you something later. Elliot : But if the ceremony's in spanish, how will I know when you guys are married? Nurse Carla Espinosa : We all shoot off our guns and throw tortillas in the air. Elliot : Really? Oh, I wish I was was ethnic. Elliot : I have a huge bunion. Sean's coming back in, like, a few weeks what am I supposed to do? J.D. : Well, I think the obvious answer is to draw Sean's face on it and tell him you grew it because you missed him. Chris Turk : *Or,* it's a simple surgery. J.D. : Uhhh, Turk, I think we've already decided on bunion-face! Elliot : Cut me the hell up. J.D. : Dammit! Movie Title: All Shook Up (1999) as Katy Dudston: Katy Dudston : Daddy, can we go home now? I'm kinda tired from all the singin' and shootin'. Movie Title: Roseanne (1988) as Becky: Becky : Why are you gettin' so mad at me? Roseanne : Because you are making *me* defend *Mark*. |
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