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 Paul Soter QuotationMovie Title: Club Dread (2004) as Dave: [Putman runs up to Dave and Juan in the Pacman maze in a banana suit] Putman : Mmm! Mmm! Mmmm! Dave : Are you trying to tell us something boy? Is Timmy trapped in the well? [Putman motions for them to follow him] Juan : [singing while running after Putman] Follow thee banana, follow thee banana! Dave : [about Putman] "Am I the only one who thinks his head looks like an octopus?" [It has just been revealed that Juan has spent time in prison] Dave : What the fuck did you do, man? Costa Rican prison - that's some hardcore anal action, man. Movie Title: Broken Lizard's Super Troopers (2001) as Foster: Officer Smy : [to Ursula] If you were my wife, I'd take you down a peg or two. [to Foster] Officer Smy : Hey douche bag. Foster : [to Ursula] If you were my wife, I'd massage your feet 'til you fell asleep. Ursula : Nice try. Foster : Okie dokie silly okio. I'm an idiot. Mac : That's true. Thorny : Where are your shoes? Foster : What are you, the shoe police? Thorny : I am, and you owe me 20 laps around the bar Foster : Black magic only works on the rookie Thorny : That's brown magic Foster : Do I look like a cat to you boy? Am I jumpin' around all nimbly bimbly from tree to tree? Am I drinking milk from a saucer? DO YOU SEE ME EATING MICE? Foster : We could be like Cagney and Lacy. Ursula : Right. Except Cagney and Lacy were both women. [Beat] Foster : I could be Lacy. [Mac gets shot in the crotch while wearing the steel cup ] Foster : How you feelin' there, Mac? Mac : Good enough... to fuck... your mother. Foster : You crapped on my heart. [Ursula meets Foster at a restaurant. Ursula is dressed as a biker, Foster is dressed as a cyclist] Foster : Ah, biker. I'm such an idiot. Ursula : [talking into voice filter] Freeze motherfucker. Foster : Oh, god, please don't shoot me. I'm naked. Ursula : Drop your coat and grab your toes. Foster : What? Ursula : I'm gonna show you where the wild goos goes. Foster : Uh, this isn't happening. I'm a police officer. Ursula, help. Ursula : Baby, I'm gonna butter your bread. [Foster turns, sees Ursula is "holding him up"] Ursula : [still talking into the voice filter] You don't have these at your station? Foster : I don't suppose you have a fresh pair of underwear I can borrow? Ursula : I'm not sure you could fit into my panties. Foster : So, Ursula, what'cha doing? Ursula : Don't use that boyfriend voice with me. Foster : Ain't so funny meow is it? |
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