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 Dennis Quaid Quotation"What, like I want to look like Dick Clark? No. I think I look great with liver spots." "I could never hold a job for more than three months, which works out well because that's how long a movie shoots." Movie Title: Savior (1998) as Guy: Guy : Sorry about your family. Vera : It's war. Guy : Don't any of the tits in this country work? [Guy is looking for a goat to milk to feed the baby] Guy : Oh, you're a billy goat. I need a Biljana. Movie Title: Breaking Away (1979) as Mike: Moocher : Hey, come on in, Dave. Dave : Nah, I read where this Italian coach said its no good to go swimmin' right after a race. Mike : Who's swimmin'? I'm takin' a leak. Mike : They're gonna keep callin' us "cutters." To them, it's just a dirty word. To me, it's just somethin' else I never got a chance to be. Mike : That's the place to be right there, Wyoming! Nothin' but prairies and mountains and nobody around. All you need is your bed roll and a good horse. Cyril : Don't forget your toothbrush! You're still in your cavity-prone years. Mike : You want to tell me who did it? Cyril : It was dark... All I can tell your for sure is that they all wore Brut after-shave and reeked of Lavoris. Movie Title: Everybody's All-American (1988) as Gavin Grey: [Gavin and Narvel are preparing to race each other down the street] Narvel Blue : Look here, Ghost. You ain't got nothing to gain by this. I beat you, word gets out the Grey Ghost got whupped by a nigger. You beat me, they'll just say the Ghost beat some nigger just like he beats everybody else. Gavin Grey : I ain't doin' it for what people say, Blue. Let's race. Movie Title: Far from Heaven (2002) as Frank Whitaker: Frank Whitaker : I know it's wrong because it makes me feel despicable. Frank Whitaker : How about this girl getting her husband another drink? Cathy Whitaker : Don't you think you've had enough, dear? Frank Whitaker : No, honey, I don't think I've had enough! [Frank is drunk at the cocktail party] Stan Fine : Frank is the luckiest guy in town! Frank Whitaker : It's all smoke and mirrors, fellas. That's all it is. You should see her without her face on. Doreen : Frank! Cathy Whitaker : No, he's absolutely right. We ladies are never what we appear, and every girl has her secrets. Movie Title: Enemy Mine (1985) as Davidge: Davidge : "If one receives evil from another, let one not do evil in return. Rather, let him extend love to the enemy, that love might unite them." I've heard all this before... in the human Taalmaan. Drac: Of course you have. Truth is truth. Davidge : Where would you be without me, Jerry? Jerry : Home. Jerry : It is not longer my life that matters. I am not fat, I am not lazy. Davidge... I await a new life. Davidge : A new life? From where? [Jerry uncovers his abdomen] Davidge : Oh my God... Oh my God, are you telling me you're pregnant? [opening narration] Davidge : By late in the 21st century, the nations of the Earth were finally at peace, working together to explore and colonize the distant reaches of space. Unfortunately, we weren't alone out there. A race of non-human aliens called the Dracs were claiming squatters' rights to some of the richest star systems in the galaxy. Well, they weren't going to get it [sic] Davidge : without a fight. Space was the new battleground. For many of us, Earth became a precious memory, light-years away. Our only home was a fortress in space. As in any war, there were long periods with nothing to do but wait. And then... Movie Title: The Rookie (2002) as Jimmy: Hunter : But Dad... Jimmy : No buts about it... I'm getting enough butts as it is. Jimmy : You know what we get to do today, Brooks? We get to play baseball. Tryout Catcher : Pitch... pitch... man, you were bringing some heat up there! Jimmy : Come on... Tryout Catcher : You got 'em talkin'! Jimmy : Naww... Tryout Catcher : You got 'em talkin'... good job, man. Dave Patterson : Jimmy, how fast were you throwing fifteen years ago? Jimmy : Slow enough to where scouts stopped using the word 'fast'. Dave Patterson : Seriously, how fast were you throwing? Jimmy : I don't know... 85-86? Dave Patterson : You just threw 98 miles an hour. Jimmy : Nawww! Dave Patterson : Twelve straight pitches, three radar guns. Same thing on all of 'em. Jimmy, I've been a scout for a long time, and the number one rule is, arms slow down when they get old. Now, if I call the office and tell 'em I got a guy here almost twice these kids' age, I'm gonna get laughed at. But, if I don't call in a 98-mile-an-hour fastball, I'm gonna get fired! I'm just saying there's a chance you might get a call on this. Movie Title: Wyatt Earp (1994) as Doc Holiday / Doc Holliday: Doc Holliday : Dave Rutabaugh is an ignorant scoundrel! I disapprove of his very existence. I considered ending it myself on several occasions but self-control got the better of me. Wyatt Earp : You been a good friend to me, Doc. Doc Holliday : Shut up. Virgil Earp : We're gonna disarm them and take 'em in. You understand, Doc? Doc Holliday : Oh, I understand Virgil. But [taps shotgun] Doc Holliday : do you think they will? Warren Earp : Wyatt, you're still a marshal around here, aren't you? Doc Holliday : Sure. But now he's going to be a marshal and an outlaw. Best of both worlds, son. Doc Holliday : Wyatt Earp? I've heard that name before. Don't know where, but it wasn't good. Wyatt Earp : What's wrong with you? Doc Holliday : What is wrong with me? What have you got? I am dying of tuberculosis. I sleep with the nastiest whore in Kansas. Everyone who knows me hates me, and every morning I wake up surprised that I have to spend another day in this piss-hole world. (To onlookers) All you can kiss my rebel dick! Wyatt Earp : Not everyone who knows you hates you, Doc. Doc Holliday : I know it's not always easy being my friend, but I'll be there when you need me. Doc Holliday : All of you can kiss my rebel dick. Doc Holliday : (to Wyatt) Have you ever wondered why you and I have been part of so many unfortunate incidents, but are still here? I have figured it out. It's nothing much, just luck. I wake up every day looking at Death, and you know what? He ain't half bad. I think the secret old Mr. Death is hiding is that for some of us, it's better on the other side. I know it can't be any worse for me. Maybe that's the place for your Maddie. Wyatt, for some of us, this world ain't ever gonna be right. Doc Holliday : What do you want to do? Wyatt Earp : Kill them all. Morgan Earp : I say we just kill 'em all. Doc Holiday : You know Morg, Wyatt Earp is my friend, but I believe I'm beginning to love you. Frank Mclaury : You're first on my list Holiday. Spend the rest of your time expecting to see my face. Doc Holiday : Mclaury, seeing you would be a nice change. I understand most of your enemies got it in the back. Doc Holiday : My mama always told me never put off till tomorrow people you can kill today. Movie Title: Playing by Heart (1998) as Hugh: Hugh : Fucker works for NBC! He's sitting in my home, with my wife, and my dog, and he doesn't have to worry about the Thursday night fucking schedule! Movie Title: Any Given Sunday (1999) as Jack 'Cap' Rooney, #19: Dr. Ollie Powers : Where does it hurt? Jack 'Cap' Rooney, #19 : Right where you're touching it! Movie Title: Undercover Blues (1993) as Jeff / Jeff Blue: Jane Blue : You brought our baby into a knife fight? Jeff Blue : It was a fair fight. Two of them, two of us... Jeff Blue : You should have seen these guys, complete amateurs. Biggest risk was I'd fall down laughing and hurt myself. Muerte : The bottom line... the bottom line is you're gonna die tonight... ugly. Jeff Blue : Look Morty, do me a favor, okay? Don't call here any more unless you want to have a serious conversation, alright? Sawyer : Oh, cute baby! Boy or girl? Jeff Blue : Gosh, I hope so! Muerte : My name... is MUERTE! Jeff : Nice to meet you Morty, my name is Jeff. Jeff Blue : You know what's funny? That gray van over there. Jane Blue : Funny ha-ha or funny interesting? Sawyer : You think you're smarter than we are. Jeff Blue : Oh, not much. Jeff Blue : See mommy picking the big lock? Someday, when you're a big girl, she'll teach you how to pick locks. Of course, she may still be picking *this* one. [Several goons pull their guns on Jeff and Jane] Sikes : Don't make any sudden movements. Jeff Blue : Why not? Is there a bee on me? Movie Title: Wilder Napalm (1993) as Wallace: Wallace : Why, we're just one big ol' thermonuclear family, Wilder! Movie Title: Jaws 3-D (1983) as Mike Brody: Mike Brody : I don't believe it. She got him in the water. Kathryn Morgan : Never underestimate the power. Movie Title: Frequency (2000) as Frank Sullivan / Frank: Frank : I'm still here, Chief. John Sullivan : You gotta be more careful, cause I can't lose you again. Not like that. Frank Sullivan : You won't John. You won't. I swear to God, no matter what. You got it? You hear me? John Sullivan : I hear you. Frank Sullivan : So how old are you? John Sullivan : I'm 36. Frank Sullivan : 36. You're all grown up. You must be married and everything. John Sullivan : No, I'm not married. Frank Sullivan : What? Too busy playing ball? John Sullivan : It didn't work out. I gave it up. Frank Sullivan : What happened? John Sullivan : I blew my arm out senior year. Didn't have a shot. Frank Sullivan : Oh, I'm sorry Johnny. I know that had to hurt. John Sullivan : Thanks. Frank Sullivan : So what did ya wind up doing? You join the department? John Sullivan : Actually I went the other way. I'm a cop. Frank Sullivan : [laughing] What? You're 3rd generation fire fighter. Come on I thought you were gonna grow out of that cop thing. John Sullivan : Well you got Satch to thank for that one. Frank Sullivan : You're kidding me huh. Satch? He was always crazy about you ever since you were born. You're still my little chief, right? John Sullivan : Yeah, I'm trying to be. I'm trying. Frank : I'm not a cop, I'm a firefighter. Frank Sullivan : I love you son. John Sullivan : I love you too dad. I missed you so much. Frank Sullivan : [talking about Julia] Well I just knew. She melted my heart. You got anybody? John Sullivan : Yeah, kinda. Something I gotta work out, but she's worth it. [pause] John Sullivan : You go ahead and get some rest. I'm tired too. Frank Sullivan : I almost don't wanna click off here. Maybe we won't get this back. John Sullivan : We will. Frank Sullivan : Ok. I'll be here tomorrow. John Sullivan : I know. Frank Sullivan : I love you son. John Sullivan : I love you too dad. I missed you so much. Frank Sullivan : John, say hello to my wife Julia. John Sullivan : Hi. Julia Sullivan : Hi John. Frank tells me you're a cop. John Sullivan : Yeah, that's right. Julia Sullivan : My six year old keeps telling us he wants to be a policeman right after he retires from the majors. We just bought him a badge and a whistle for his birthday. John Sullivan : Yeah, I remember I used to play cops and robbers all the time, and my mom wouldn't let me have a toy gun. Julia Sullivan : Sounds like your mom and I would get along. John Sullivan : Yeah, she's pretty special. I'm real proud of her. Julia Sullivan : I bet she's proud of you too, being a cop and all. John Sullivan : I hope so. I hope she knows how much I love her. Julia Sullivan : She knows. Mom's always know how much their kids love them, even if they don't tell them all the time. Well I gotta go. It was good talking to ya John. John Sullivan : You too. Movie Title: Postcards from the Edge (1990) as Jack Faulkner / Jack: Jack Faulkner : What is it that especially bothers you, that it was on the same day or that it was Evelyn Ames? Suzanne Vale : It's not the fact that you fuck around A LOT, it's that you lie about it. You could have just told me the truth and then fucked them ALL. Had the cigarette with me. Jack Faulkner : That is such bullshit. Women are always saying it's not the fact that you left, it's the way that you did it. It's not that you fuck around, it's that you lie about it. You're all so full of shit. It IS the fact that I fuck around, and it is that fact that I WILL leave. Jack Faulkner : I do not like this particular side of you! Suzanne Vale : I'm not a box, I don't have sides. This is it, one side fits all! Suzanne Vale : You said you loved me. Jack Faulkner : I meant it at the time. Suzanne Vale : Well what was it, a viral love? Kind of a 24 hour thing? Doris : So, how long have you known Suzanne? Jack : Oh, about a month. Seems like longer, though. Doris : I know what you mean. I'm her mother and it seems longer. Jack Faulkner : Are we breaking up? Suzanne Vale : We can't break up, we were never together. Jack Faulkner : Should come as news to you, you're acting like a wife. Suzanne Vale : Better than acting like a whore! Jack Faulkner : You're in no position to judge me, you just got out of a drug clinic. Suzanne Vale : Which is where you belong, Mr. Pothead, Mr. Vodka, Mr. Bedroom Eyes! Doris Mann: So you said you have a ranch? Jack Faulkner : Yeah, out in Malibu. Doris Mann: If all ranchers looked like you, there wouldn't be many crops. Jack Faulkner : Depends on what you're raising. Doris Mann: Certainly not doubts! [both laugh, Suzanne enters] Doris Mann: Oh, I was just coming to get you, your little friend is here. Suzanne Vale : Can I speak to you for a moment in private? Doris Mann: Excuse me, my daughter wants to speak to me. [both step into alcove] Suzanne Vale : I would really just like a few people of my own without them having to like you so much! Doris Mann: I was just being friendly. And I don't care if he likes me or not, your friend in there with the bedroom eyes. Suzanne Vale : Right. And the living room nose, the kitchen forehead and den ears. Movie Title: Innerspace (1987) as Lt. Tuck Pendleton: [Into a mirror] Lt. Tuck Pendleton : The Tuck Pendleton machine: zero defects. Lt. Tuck Pendleton : When things are at their darkest, pal, it's a brave man that can kick back and party. Lt. Tuck Pendleton : We're gonna drink this one to Ozzie. A good man who tried to save my ass by injecting me into yours. Lt. Tuck Pendleton : Congratulations, Jack. You just digested the bad guy. [Jack burps] Jack Putter : We've got the chip! Lt. Tuck Pendleton : All right! Jack Putter : We're on the way to the lab! Lt. Tuck Pendleton : All right! Jack Putter : But I think they put someone in there with you! Lt. Tuck Pendleton : All... what? Movie Title: The Night the Lights Went Out in Georgia (1981) as Travis: Travis : And I asked the Lord, "Lord, why have you forsaken me?". But there was silence. So , I asked again, "Lord, WHY have you forsaken me??", and there was silence. So I asked again, "LORD, WHY have you forsaken me??"..... and this great booming voice said "Geez, I don't know Travis, I guess something about you just chaps at my ass." Movie Title: D.O.A. (1988) as Dexter Cornell: Dexter Cornell : [laughing] So this is what it's all about: some kid's damn homework! Dexter Cornell : So, who you gonna kill for your next novel? [Last line] Dexter Cornell : Just somebody's homework, is all. Movie Title: The Day After Tomorrow (2004) as Jack Hall: Jack Hall : Professor, I think it's time you guys got out of there. Terry Rapson : I'm afraid that time has come and gone, my friend. Jack Hall : What should we do? Terry Rapson : Save as many as you can. Jason Evans : What's going to happen to us? Jack Hall : What do you mean? Jason Evans : I mean "us"? Civilization? Everyone? Jack Hall : Mankind survived the last ice age. We're certainly capable of surviving this one. The only question is, will we be able to learn from our mistakes? Jack Hall : I will come for you, do you understand me? Movie Title: Great Balls of Fire! (1989) as Jerry Lee Lewis / Jerry Lee: Jerry Lee Lewis : Well, if I'm going to hell, I'm going there playing the piano. Jimmy Swaggart : Thank you Jesus! Jerry Lee Lewis : Well don't thank Jesus, thank Jerry Lee Lewis. Lois Brown : "Jerry Lee here's a married man, ain't that right, Jerry Lee?" Jerry Lee : "Well, that's not necessarily so, Lois." Lois : " And just what do you mean by that?" Jerry Lee : "Well, you see I was still married to my first wife when I married my second wife,so I never really was married to my second wife. And since I divorced my first wife a couple of years ago, I'm as free as a bird in a tree!" Jerry Lee Lewis : Follow that, Killer! Movie Title: Something to Talk About (1995) as Eddie Bichon: Eddie Bichon : Em, Emma Rae. Emma Rae : Are you addressing me? Eddie Bichon : Yes. Emma Rae : Well lick it, put a stamp on it, and mail it to someone who gives a shit. Eddie Bichon : If you didn't want to get married why did you? Grace : Why'd you ask me? Eddie Bichon : Why'd I ask you? Grace : Yeah, you're the one who hasn't even stopped dating yet! Grace : Oh don't you lay that on me! I have orgasms everyday I've just gotten so use to having them when your not in the room. Eddie Bichon : Well that's just GREAT! Wyly King : You know you were lucky to get her the first time. Eddie Bichon : It was a damn miracle. Movie Title: The Big Easy (1987) as Remy McSwain: Remy McSwain : If I can't have you, can I at least have my gator? Remy McSwain : Just relax, darlin'. This is the Big Easy. Folks have a certain way o' doin' things down here. Anne Osborne : You're a cop for God's sake, you're supposed to uphold the law, but instead you bend it and twist it and sell it. I saw you take that bribe and, and resist arrest and tamper with evidence and perjure yourself under oath. Remy McSwain : Don't forget I ran a red light too, huh. Anne Osborne : You still think it's funny, don't you? Why don't you just face it, Remy? You're not one of the good guys anymore. Remy McSwain : Now they're killing retards. McCabe : Then why aren't you dead? Movie Title: Dinner with Friends (2001) as Gabe: Karen : But those were such happy times! We saw them practically every weekend. When would she have time to have an affair? Gabe : I don't know. During the week? Movie Title: Dragonheart (1996) as Bowen: Gilbert : Never have I seen such skill. Bowen : You must have led a sheltered life. Bowen : Don't clutter up a clever scheme with morality. Draco : Who's the girl? Bowen : A nuisance! Get rid of her! Draco : Why? Bowen : They're trying to placate you with a sacrifice! Draco : Oh, now who ever gave them that bright idea? Bowen : Never mind! Just get rid of her! Draco : How? Bowen : Eat her! Draco : Oh, please. YUCK! Bowen : Aren't we squeamish, you ate Sir Egglemore, hypocrite! Draco : I merely chewed in self-defense, but I never swallowed. Bowen : I no longer try to change the world dragon, I just try to make my way in it. Draco : Ah, well it's better than death I suppose. Bowen : I would think you would welcome death. All of your friends gone; hunted wherever you go. Draco : Do you delight in reminding me? Yes knight, I do long for death, but... fear it. Bowen : Why? Aside from your misery, what's to lose? Draco : My soul. Bowen : Dreams die hard and you hold them in your hand long after they have turned to dust. [Bowen simply stares as Kara passionately implores him to help lead the rebellion] Kara : Well, what are you looking at? Bowen : Myself, long ago. Bowen : Without you Draco, where will we go, where do we turn? Draco : To the stars Bowen, to the stars. Bowen : You have the poet's gift of exaggeration. Gilbert : You should read some of my histories. [Bowen has just pretended to kill Draco- again] Gilbert : Well done, Bowen! You've done it again! What a brute! That's even bigger than the last one! Bowen : Actually, it's about the same size. King Einon : You never cease to amaze me Bowen. Now you have brought my future wife and a priest to wed us. Bowen : To bury you. King Einon : Well, to bury one of us. Bowen : I will not rest until I have rid the world of every last one of you. Draco : I am the last one! Draco : Strike! Bowen : But you're my friend. Draco : Then as a friend, strike, please! Bowen : [is stuck in Draco's mouth - sees an arm stuck in the teeth and plucks it out] Oh, good lord! Sir Elglemore! [throws the arm out behind him] Draco : Oh, thank you. That's been stuck down there for months. Now, would you mind getting your buttocks off my tongue? Bowen : Why should you be comfortable? My armor is rusting in your drool and your breath is absolutely foul. Draco : Well, what do you expect with knights rotting in my molars? Movie Title: The Right Stuff (1983) as Gordon Cooper: Gordon Cooper : You know what makes this bird go up? FUNDING makes this bird go up. Gus Grissom : He's right. No bucks, no Buck Rogers. Alan Shepard : Dear Lord, please don't let me fuck up. Gordon Cooper : I didn't quite copy that. Say again, please. Alan Shepard : I said everything's A-OK. Pancho Barnes : What are you two rookies gonna have? Gordon Cooper : Rookies? Now hold on, sis. You are looking at a whole new ballgame here now. In fact, in a couple of years, I bet you're even gonna immortalize us by putting our pictures up there on your wall. [unwittingly referring to the dead pilot memorial over the bar] Gordon Cooper : What? I say somethin' wrong here? Pancho Barnes : I tell you, we got two categories of pilots around here. We got your prime pilots that get all the hot planes, and we got your pud-knockers who dream about getting the hot planes. Now what are you two pud-knockers gonna have? Huh? Gordon Cooper : Who was the best pilot I ever saw? Well, uh, you're lookin' at 'im. [Gordo has been ordered to provide a sperm sample] Gordon Cooper : Yeah, but uh, nurse, how am I supposed to uh... Nurse Murch : The best results seem to be obtained through fantasization, accompanied by masturbation, followed by ejaculation. Gordon Cooper : Well, that sounds easy enough. Movie Title: The Long Riders (1980) as Ed Miller: [Rixley is trying to get Ed Miller to inform on the James/Younger gang] Ed Miller : Suppose I do; those boys got relatives all around this area. One of 'em would kill me soon as I got out. Besides, Jesse might just change his mind; and he pays better than you do, Mr. Pinkerton Man. Movie Title: The Alamo (2004) as Sam Houston: Sam Houston : You will remember this battle! Each minute! Each second! Until that day that you die! But that is for tomorrow, gentlemen. For today, remember the Alamo! |
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