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 Omid Djalili QuotationMovie Title: Gladiator (2000) as Slave Trader: [Looking at some slaves] Proximo : Can any of them fight? I've got a match coming up. Slave Trader : Some are good for fighting, others for dying. You need both, I think. Movie Title: Whoopi (2003) as Nasim: Nasim : I haven't felt this oppressed since the Ayatollah blew up my beach house. Mavis : Nasim, the thing is nobody can tell the difference between Arabs and Persians, and quite frankly, nobody cares. Nasim : We followed your East Coast/West Coast rap wars. There were Tupac/Biggie updates every half-hour on al-Jazeera! Courtney : You sure you know what you're doing? Nasim : Excuse me, I was trained by the Iranian Militia to build a missile system... which we do not have! Movie Title: Between Iraq and a Hard Place (2003) as Iraqi Television Host: Iraqi Television Host : Donald Rumsfeld, you met Saddam in 1983 to discuss military and economic support for his regime, even though at the time he was launching gas attacks on Iranian soldiers. Donald Rumsfeld : No sorry, but wasn't that a different Saddam? Iraqi Television Host : No, no, no I don't think so. Donald Rumsfeld : No, no, that guy was a key ally, a trusted friend and a vital force in the battle against Islamic extremism. Iraqi Television Host : No this is the very same Saddam. Donald Rumsfeld : Well in that case it was a different Donald Rumsfeld. Iraqi Television Host : But you have many people who are supporting you across the years. For example Ronald Reagan, Margaret Thatcher, and of course, George Bush Senior. You thought they were thousands of miles away in the safety of America, and Europe, and you are absolutely right. Iraqi Television Host : Then in 1979 you called a special meeting of the Iraqi Parliament to denounce those you believe betrayed you, and you asked them to step outside. [Footage showing this meeting] Iraqi television host: Sadly none of those Ministers asked to leave that day can be with us tonight. Saddam Hussein : No, because I had them shot. Iraqi television host: And rightly so. Nor can your own son-in-law who you promised to protect on his return to Iraq, having told the world about your secret military arsenal. You shot him too? Saddam Hussein : No no no, no I had someone else do that. Iraqi television host: Excellent. Iraqi Television Host : But luckily there is one person from your past who is still alive. Do you recognise this voice? Donald Rumsfeld : (voice-over) Hi there, Saddam. Sorry I can't be with you tonight but er, ha, don't worry, we're on our way. Movie Title: The Calcium Kid (2004) as Herbie Bush: Jimmy : [holding a shirt with 'The Kalcium Kid' on it] But calcium is spelled with a 'C,' not a 'K', Mr. Bush. Herbie Bush : C, K, C, K, CK... It's flummoxed. Movie Title: The Mummy (1999) as Warden Gad Hassan: Warden Gad Hassan : No more goat soup. Warden Gad Hassan : What are we going to do? What are we going to do? Rick : [Jumping overboard] Wait here. I'll get help. Evelyn : Why is this man in prison? Warden Gad Hassan : This I did not know. But when I heard you were coming, I asked him that thing myself. Evelyn : And what did he say? Warden Gad Hassan : That he was just looking for a good time. Evelyn : Where are they taking him? Warden Gad Hassan : To be hanged. Apparently, he had a VERY good time. Jonathan : What was that sound? Rick : It sounded like... bugs. Evelyn : [to the warden] He said bugs. Warden Gad Hassan : What do you mean bugs? I hate bugs. |
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