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 Curly Howard Quotation"Arf! Arf! Arf!" "RrrrARF!" "Oh, wise guy, eh!" "N'yuk!" "Nyuk, Nyuk, Nyuk!" "Woo-woo-woo!" "Soitainly!" Movie Title: Oily to Bed, Oily to Rise (1939) as Curly: Curly : Don't look now, but I think we're about to be killed. Movie Title: A Plumbing We Will Go (1940) as Curly: Curly : Say why don't you call your stops? Moe : This is far enough I guess. Larry : Where are we? Curly : What do you care as long as we're not in jail. Movie Title: Three Little Beers (1935) as Curly: Desk Relief Clerk : Pardon me gentlemen. Moe : You mean us? Desk Relief Clerk : Yes, are you mebers of the press? Moe : Why uh... Curly : I used to be! But I didn't do any pressing. I went through the pockets, sort of a "dry cleaning"! Nyuk, nyuk, nyuk, nyuk! Movie Title: Men in Black (1934) as Dr. Curly Howard: Hiccupping Nurse : Oh, Dr. Howard, Dr. Fine, Dr. Howard! Is it true that an apple a day keeps the doctor away? Dr. Moe Howard : Yes, that's true. Hiccupping Nurse : Well, then, why don't the patients eat an apple a day and save hospital expenses? Dr. Curly Howard : Pardon me if I laugh. Nyuk, nyuk, nyuk, nyuk, nyuk, nyuk, nyuk, nyuk, nyuk, nyuk, nyuk, nyuk, nyuk! That's a pippin! Hiccupping Nurse : Oh, I know what a pippin is. Dr. Larry Fine : You do, eh? What's a pippin? Hiccupping Nurse : Uh, a pippin is an apple with a skin on the outside. Dr. Moe Howard : Did you ever see an apple with a skin on the inside? Hiccupping Nurse : Oh, sure I did. Dr. Larry Fine : You did? Hiccupping Nurse : Uh-huh. Dr. Larry Fine : Where? Hiccupping Nurse : In homemade apple pie. Dr. Moe Howard : How is she, doctor? Doctor with 'Tiny Patient' : A slight hope. Dr. Curly Howard : That's too bad. What's the matter? Doctor with 'Tiny Patient' : She's in a coma. Tiny Patient : [sitting up] I am not! I'm in a bed! [After being asked where they found their respective patients] Dr. Larry Fine : Under the bed! Dr. Moe Howard : Up on the chandelier! Dr. Graves : What did you do for him? Dr. Curly Howard : Nothing! What'd he ever do for us? Movie Title: A Bird in the Head (1946) as Curly: Moe : Say, are you scared? Curly : No. Its silly to be scared. Larry : It sure is! Curly : Boy, am I silly... Movie Title: Dizzy Detectives (1943) as Curly: Larry : What happened? What's wrong? Curly : I'm dyin' and you start a quiz program! Moe : Where's your gun? Curly : Gun? Oh! The landlady's baby was cryin', so I gave it to the baby to play with. Moe : [whispering] It's that crook and he's wearin' a fur coat! Come on! [The Stooges come up and Moe gets the gorilla's attention by kicking him in the butt. The Stooges all point their guns at the gorilla] Moe : Stick 'em up, Ape Man! We gotcha covered! [The gorilla destroys the Stooges' guns] Moe : Hey, fellas! Look! No human is strong enough to bend a gun barrel like that! Curly : It's real! A real chimmanypanzee! Larry : That's no chimp, ya chump! That's a gorilla! Moe : Next time you handle a gun, shoot yourself in the head. Curly : I'll make a note of it. How do you spell head? Moe : B-O-N-E. head! [he whacks him in the head with a gun and the gun bends] Curly : That ox can't call me a monkey! Moe : Shut up you baboon! [Curly sticks his tongue at Moe while Moe puts a clothespin on his tongue] Curly : I don't wanna be dead. There's no future in it! Movie Title: In the Sweet Pie and Pie (1941) as Curly: Curly : No! I'm too young to die. Too young and too handsome! [looks in the mirror] Curly : Well, I'm too young. Mrs. Gottrocks : I hear you have done much traveling. Are you familiar with the Great Wall of China? Curly : No, but I know a big fence in Chicago! Movie Title: Sock-a-Bye Baby (1942) as Curly: Larry : Hey, what do kids eat? Moe : What do kids eat? That's easy. Soft stuff; no bones, no potato chips. What did you eat when you were a baby? Curly : Weeds. Curly : Gee, I wonder what I looked like when I was a baby and the stork delivered me. Moe : When you were a baby, the buzzard brought you! Curly : Oh, special delivery, eh? [trying to eat an artichoke] Curly : I'd like to meet the guy who invented these barbed-wire pineapples! Movie Title: Punch Drunks (1934) as Curley: Curley : What'll ya have? Moe : I'll have four pieces of burnt toast and a rotten egg. Curley : Why do you want that? Moe : I gotta tape worm and it's good enough for him. Movie Title: Disorder in the Court (1936) as Curly: [Judge is about to ask Curly if he swears to tell the whole truth and nothing but the truth] Judge : Do you swear... Curly : No, but I know all the woids. Curly : I'm a victim of circumstance. Curly : I'm a victim of circumstance. [Curly is taking the oath] Court Clerk: Take off your hat. [Curly takes off his hat with his right hand] Court Clerk: Raise your right hand. [With his right hand, Curly puts his hat back on, and raises the hand] Court Clerk: [gesturing to the book he is holding] Put your left hand here. Judge : [to Curly] Take off you hat. [Curly does so with his right hand] Court Clerk: [to Curly] Raise your right hand. [Curly puts his hat back on to raise the hand] Court Clerk: [gesturing to the book he is holding] Now, put your left hand here. Judge : [to Curly] Please, take off your hat. [Curly does so with his right hand] Court Clerk: [to Curly] Raise your right hand. [Curly repeats the process] Court Clerk: [gesturing to the book he is holding] Now, put your left hand here. Judge : [to Curly] Will you please take off your hat? [Curly does so with his right hand] Court Clerk: [angrily, to Curly] Raise your RIGHT HAND. [Curly repeats the process] Court Clerk: [gesturing to the book he is holding] Now, put your left hand here. Judge : [to Curly] Take off your hat. [Curly takes off the hat and places it on his cane, which is in his right hand] Court Clerk: [to Curly] Raise your right hand. [Curly raises his cane with the hat on it] Court Clerk: [taking the hat off the cane] Get rid of that hat. [Curly takes the hat and puts it on the court clerk's head] Curly : [with both hands on the book] Raise YOUR right hand. [the court clerk does so, startles, takes the hat off, and places it under the book] Court Clerk: Raise your right hand. [Curly does so] Judge : Allow the witness to proceed. The court understands him. Curly : Nice, courty, your a pal. Defense Attorney: Mr. Howard, kindly tell the court what you know about Kirk Robbin's murder. Curly : [to the Judge] Well, it was like this, Mr. Court... Defense Attorney: Address the judge as your honor. Curly : [to the Judge] Well, it was like this, my honor... Defense Attorney: "Your honor". Not "My honor". Curly : Why? Don't you like him? Defense Attorney: Drop the vernacular. Curly : [staring down at his hat] Vernacular? [points to it] Curly : That's a Derby. Curly : I'm no mule. Moe : No, your ears are too short. [With Curly taking the oath, the court clerk is speaking rapidly] Curly : Are you trying to give me the double talk? Judge : He's asking you if you'll swear to tell the truth. Curly : Truth is stranger than fiction, Judgie-Wudgie. Movie Title: Idiots Deluxe (1945) as Curly: [Curly and Larry are unaware that there's a bear in the backseat of their car. The bear hits Curly in the head] Curly : HMMM! Cut it out! Larry : Cut what out? Curly : Don't be cute! [the bear hits Curly again] Curly : HMMMMMMMMMMMMMM! [the bear hits Larry] Larry : Oh! What's the idea of hitting me? Curly : I hit you because you hit me! [brief pause] Curly : I didn't hit you! Larry : Oh, yes you did. You hit me, but I didn't hit you. Curly : Oh, skip it! [the bear hits Curly's head on the side, cause his to bump into Larry's] Curly : See, you did it again! Ah - hey, how could you have hit me in the head with your hands on your lap? Larry : Yeah! Curly : What a dope I am! Larry : I'll say! Curly : It was Moe all the time! [Curly turns around] Curly : Listen, I got - [the bear growls] Curly and Larry: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Movie Title: Three Little Twirps (1943) as Curly: Curly : Gee, I haven't been to the circus since I got out of the fourth grade! Moe : Yeah, and that was last year. Movie Title: Cash and Carry (1937) as Curly: Moe : There's enough gold here to get little Jimmy an operation! Curly : There's enough gold here to get ALL of us an operation! [the Stooges all look at a map marked "Walla Walla"] Moe : Walla Walla with an "X." Curly : I know! "X" marks the spot where the treasure is buried! It's in the Walla. Moe : But there's two Wallas. Curly : Certainly! There's a Walla, and there's a Walla over there. Larry : Which one's it buried in? Moe : It makes no difference, we'll each take a Walla. Movie Title: Wee Wee Monsieur (1938) as Curly: Moe : The landlord's threatened to throw us out. Curly : What's he squawking about, we only owe for eight months. Curly : Ah my fair beauty, open up thy curtains so that I might see your fair kisser. Moe : "Oh boy! I'll take the blonde!" Larry : "I'll take the brunette!" Curly : "I'll take the black and tan!" [After Moe conks Curly in the head with a chisel, and then apologizes] Curly : Oh, oui, oui, oui, oui. Moe : Oui what? Curly : "Oui" ("We") should be more careful about what we do around here...Chisler! [Moe conks him again] Movie Title: Whoops, I'm an Indian! (1936) as Curly: [While posing as indians] Moe : How. Larry : How. Curly : And how! Movie Title: Half-Wits Holiday (1947) as Curly: Prof. Quackenbush : How would you like to earn $1000 dollars? Moe : Who do we have to murder? Prof. Quackenbush : It's nothing like that. All you need to do is let me make gentlemen out of you. Curly : Oh please no! There hasn't been a gentleman in our family for 50 generations! Moe : Quit bragging. Movie Title: Matri-Phony (1942) as Curleycue: Guard at Pottery Shop : Hey, what's behind those drapes? Curleycue : The back of the drapes! Movie Title: False Alarms (1936) as Curly: Fire Chief : If this were the army I'd have you shot at sunrise! Curly : But you couldn't do that, cap, we don't get up that early! Movie Title: Hoi Polloi (1935) as Curly: Professor Rich: Spell "cat." Curly : Cat, K-I-T-T-Y, pussy! Movie Title: No Dough Boys (1944) as Curly: Moe : They are very well bred. Curly : I take mine toasted! Movie Title: You Nazty Spy! (1940) as Curly Gallstone, Field Marshal: Moe : [Holding a book.] I'll keep this. Curly Gallstone, Field Marshal : Oh, a bookkeeper. Moe : Go burn the books. Larry : Why burn the books? Moe : There are too many bookmakers. The bookies are overrunning the country. Those are my orders. Moe : Ring for my sectery. Larry : You mean secretary? Moe : I said sectery! Larry : Secretary. Moe : Which is correct? Curly Gallstone, Field Marshal : Stenographer. I'll ring for her. Guard: I caught this man walking down the street with a chicken Curly Gallstone, Field Marshal : Blonde or brunette? Moe : [to Curly] Quiet. [to Man] Moe : Where'd you get the chicken? Man: From an egg. Larry : Where'd you get the egg? Man: From a chicken. Curly Gallstone, Field Marshal : Ah, a vicious cycle. We must kill it. Remind me to kill a cycle. Larry Pebble, Minister of Propanganda : We will now pause for station identification. Curly Gallstone, Field Marshal : This is N-U-T-S. Larry Pebble, Minister of Propanganda : When you hear the conk on the dome, it will be exactly 3 o'clock. [whacks Curly on the head] Larry Pebble, Minister of Propanganda : 3 o'clock Bolonia watch time. Curly Gallstone, Field Marshal : 3 o'clock Bolonia watch time. Mr. Ixnay : We've come here to offer you the greatest opportunity of your life. Moe : You mean you'll let us paper the living room? Mr. Ixnay : No, no, no. You're through with papering. My partners and I are going to make you Dictator of Moronica. Moe : Dictator? What does a Dictator do? Mr. Ixnay : A Dictator? Why, he makes love to beautiful women, drinks champagne, enjoys life and never works. He makes speeches to the people promising them plenty, gives them nothing and takes everything. *That's* a Dictator. Curly Gallstone, Field Marshal : Hmph, a parasite. That's for me. Curly Gallstone, Field Marshal : Hmph, a parasite. That's for me. Movie Title: Three Sappy People (1939) as Curly: Moe : Remind me to tear out your Adam's apple! Curly : I'll make a note of it. [pulls out a pad of paper and a pencil] Movie Title: Movie Maniacs (1936) as Curly: Curly : How are we gonna get in pictures? We don't know nothin' about makin' movies! Moe : There's a couple of thousand people in pictures now who know nothing about it. Three more won't make any difference. |
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