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    Daniel von Bargen Quotation


    "I don't necessarily like going to the movies. It's a little nerve-wracking to see your head the size of a house. I'm getting used to it, but there's still a little uneasiness when you walk into the theater and think "Oh God, am I going to suck?'"

    [on his role in "Seinfeld"] "When you start becoming a commodity because of your face or your stature or whatever, those opportunities become fewer and fewer. So it's nice to get on a comedy and have people go, "You're funny!'"

    [on being typecast as an authority figure] "Thank God for the white male power structure."



    Movie Title: Malcolm in the Middle (2000) as Commandant Spangler:



    Commandant Spangler : Ahh, passive resistance. The last resort for slackers and sissies.
    Francis : What about Ghandi?
    Commandant Spangler : Sissy.

    Movie Title: Lord of Illusions (1995) as Nix:



    Nix : I was born to murder the world.


    Dorothea : What ARE you?
    Nix : A man who wanted to become a god... then changed his mind.


    Nix : I've got so much power to give you, Swann. All you have to do is beg.
    Philip Swann : Fuck you.


    Nix : Are you ready for my wisdom?





    Movie Title: The Postman (1997) as Sheriff:



    Sheriff : You're nothing but a drifter who found a bag of mail.





    Movie Title: Shaft (2000) as Lt. Kearney:


    [Trey starts seizing on the gurney]
    Walter Wade, Jr. : Heh, guess he had no rhythm after all! [Shaft punches him in the face]
    Lt. Kearney : I've been waiting for this, you are gone from this precinct!
    John Shaft : For what? [punches Wade again]
    John Shaft : For THAT?





    Movie Title: O Brother, Where Art Thou? (2000) as Sheriff Cooley:


    [As a noose is flung over Pete]
    Sheriff Cooley : Stairway to heaven. We shall all meet by and by.

    [about to be hung]
    Ulysses Everett McGill : It ain't the law!
    Sheriff Cooley : The law? The law is a human institution.





    Movie Title: Broken Lizard's Super Troopers (2001) as Police Chief Grady:



    Police Chief Grady : Desperation is a stinky cologne.


    Police Chief Grady : I'm sorry about that delousing. Just standard procedure.
    Farva : It's powdered sugar.
    Police Chief Grady : The lice hate the sugar.
    Farva : It's delicious.


    Police Chief Grady : I will have the enchilada platter with two tacos and no guacamoles. Mike?
    Officer Smy : Yeah, chief. I'll have a CHINCHILLA.
    Rabbit : I don't get it. Tacos?
    Thorny : They think I'm Mexican.
    Rabbit : You're not?

       
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