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 Michael McShane QuotationMovie Title: Brotherly Love (1995) as Lloyd: Joe : After your dad was, ah, "Lost at Sea," um, did your mom date a lot? Lloyd : We had to eat. Joe : Did, she, like, ever get married without letting you know? Lloyd : Just once in the 60's, but it was null the next day. The Kennedys are a very powerful family... We had to eat! Joe : You think The Sound of Music is the scariest movie of all time? Lloyd : The hills are alive! Movie Title: Ri¢hie Ri¢h (1994) as Professor Keenbean: Professor Keenbean : Hey! Need a new bed pan? I know I do! Movie Title: Whose Line Is It Anyway? (1988) as Mike McShane: Mike McShane : Don't mess with the Neon Love Chicken! Mike McShane : You should see the Synchronized Humping The Tony. Brad: We must kill that monster! Ryan Stiles : His name's Gary! Mike McShane : Gary! Colin Mochrie : Gary, Gary! Clive Anderson : [fielding suggestions from the audience] And we're going to want to have a crisis that the world is facing. Audience Member 1: Richard Nixon comes back from the dead! Audience Member 2: An asteroid about to crash into the earth! Clive Anderson : A jam shortage. Okay, so it's - Greg Proops : WHO are you listening to? Mike McShane : Where are you receiving your suggestions from, British Telecom? Movie Title: Castle in the Sky (1986) as Charles: Charles : Pazu likes Sheeta! Dola : Be Quiet! Movie Title: Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves (1991) as Friar Tuck: Friar Tuck : Let us open a bottle and do our best to save each other's souls. Azeem : Alas, I am not permitted. Friar Tuck : Fine then, you talk, I'll drink. Friar Tuck : This is grain, which any fool can eat, but for which the Lord intended a more divine means of consumption. Let us give praise to our maker and glory to his bounty by learning about... BEER. Friar Tuck : I'd rather roast in hell Movie Title: Clerks (2000) as Big Mac: Big Mac : Hello good people of Leonardo. I, like the mayor, was on my way to a costume, but incidentally, not the same costume party. I am able to remove my costume but I have decided to wear it as protection against the deadly virus. Are there any questions? Tovah Hernandaz-Carlson : Who are you supposed to be? Big Mac : I'm Big Mac. Beloved constable and best friend to Ronald McDonald. Now are there any questions about the virus? Steve-Dave : Will this administration ever bring the Hamburglar to justice? Big Mac : No... Yes. Look, does anybody have any questions about the virus that could kill us all? Reporter: Can the virus kill the Grimace? Big Mac : Nothing can kill the Grimace. All right, we're done here. Movie Title: Drop Dead Gorgeous (1999) as Harold Vilmes: Hank Vilmes : Ow, Harold, Mom said not the head. Harold Vilmes : Well, Mom's dead, so shut your fly trap. Hank Vilmes : I will if you shut your piehole. Harold Vilmes : Don't make me kick ya where the good Lord split ya. Movie Title: Office Space (1999) as Dr. Swanson: Peter Gibbons : So I was sitting in my cubicle today, and I realized, ever since I started working, every single day of my life has been worse than the day before it. So that means that every single day that you see me, that's on the worst day of my life. Dr. Swanson : What about today? Is today the worst day of your life? Peter Gibbons : Yeah. Dr. Swanson : Wow, that's messed up. |
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