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 Julia Sweeney QuotationMovie Title: Suddenly Susan (1996) as Rachel Fismann: Rachel Fismann : Would you like a pig in a blanket? It's a tiny wiener with a little dough, just like my first husband. Movie Title: Stuart Saves His Family (1995) as Mea C.: Stuart Smalley : I want you to look in that mirror, and I want you to repeat after me: "I am a worthy human being." Mea C. : [barely audible] I am a worthy human being. Stuart Smalley : Okay, I really couldn't hear you. Try again. Mea C. : I am a worthy human being? Stuart Smalley : No, Mia, it's not a question. Try it again. Mea C. : I am... I'm sorry, what is the second part? Stuart Smalley : Worthy human being. I am a worth human being. Just say it. Mea C. : I'm sorry, am I saying it to you, or to myself? Stuart Smalley : Just say it. I am a worthy human being. Mea C. : I am a worthy human being. Stuart Smalley : Okay, louder. Mea C. : I am a worthy human being. Stuart Smalley : Mean it. Mea C. : I am a worthy human being. Stuart Smalley : Believe it. Mea C. : [screams] I HATE YOU, MOM. [low] Mea C. : Sorry. Movie Title: Gremlins 2: The New Batch (1990) as Peggy, the Lab Receptionist: Peggy, the Lab Receptionist : Dr. Catheter, a package came for you today. Dr. Catheter : Ah. I hope it's my malaria. [Sees it's not] Dr. Catheter : Rabies. I have rabies. I'm supposed to get the flu this week. Peggy, the Lab Receptionist : I think we have the flu out on back order. [sneezes into tissue] Dr. Catheter : Can I have that? Peggy, the Lab Receptionist : Sure. Dr. Catheter : Thank you. Movie Title: Baby Blues (2000) as Wanda: Wanda : Darryl, I'm not upset that you like looking at pretty girls, I made my peace with that when I decided to marry a sighted heterosexual man. Wanda : Shouldn't you be in school? Bizzy : That's okay, I caught the history teacher staring at my legs. I own that guy. Melinda : Listen, kids, nobody's going to Hell. It's just something your father and I say to get you to do stuff. Wanda : You didn't have to sell out your whole moral code. Melinda : I still got the monster under the bed. Darryl : How bout my cousin Earl and his wife? They're nice and they like to travel. Wanda : Avoiding a subpoena is not liking to travel. Movie Title: It's Pat (1994) as Pat Riley / Pat: Hood : So, what we wanna know is are you a brotha or a sista? Pat : Well, I'm an only child... [Pat falls down a flight of stairs] Kyle Jacobs: Are you all right... um... um... you there? Chris : Yeah, hon. Did you break anything? Pat Riley : Oh, I crushed my nuts! Kyle Jacobs: Ooooh, that's got to hurt! Pat Riley : Oh, shoot! [holding up crushed walnuts] Pat Riley : There goes my afternoon snack! Pat Riley : Howdy, Tippy! Tippy: Oh... oh Pat... what do you want? Pat Riley : Well I just thought I'd stop by and pick up a few personal items. Tippy: Oh no no no, please, remember? No, I don't want to know anything about your... your sex life, okay? Pat Riley : I just want to get a few toiletries. Uh, first of all, I need some protection... Tippy: Oh dear God, okay, all right. Pat Riley : ...from underarm wetness. I'm never one to offend! Tippy: 2.50 then, all right, and you're out... Pat Riley : What am I, in a race? Whoa! Tippy: Well, kind of, uh... Pat Riley : And I need a lubricant... Tippy: What? Pat Riley : ...for my eyes. They're drying up due to the pollen and dust in the air. Tippy: Oh great, help me, somebody please help me! Pat Riley : And I need some feminine napkins... Tippy: Oh, I'm in hell... I am in hell now! Pat Riley : You never know when Aunt Wilma's gonna stop by for lunch! Pat : I played with the Ween! Chris : I find everything about you... endlessly fascinating. Pat Riley : Join the club! Groupie : You were great tonight, Pat. Pat Riley : Oh, you thought so to? Pat Riley : So... did I tell you I'm unemployed? Kathy Griffin : Yea, uh, about 400 times. Pat Riley : Say, do you think you could make an announcement about it at the radio station? Kathy Griffin : Absolutely not. Pat Riley : Ok, well think about it, but when you do make the annoucement let me know. I want to tell my friends to tune in. They don't listen to your show normally. Movie Title: Stuart Little (1999) as Mrs. Keeper: Mrs. Keeper : Mr. and Mrs. Little, we try to discourage couples from adopting outside of their own... species. It rarely works out. Movie Title: Pulp Fiction (1994) as Raquel: The Wolf : You see that, young lady? Respect. Respect for one's elders gives character. Raquel : I have character. The Wolf : Just because you are a character doesn't mean that you have character. |
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