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 Tress MacNeille QuotationMovie Title: Carrotblanca (1995) as Penelope: Penelope : Sam, play it for me please. [Sam sighs] Penelope : [Plays one note to start the song] [Bugs comes running over] Bugs : I told you never to play that song again! Movie Title: A Wish for Wings That Work (1991) as The Chicken: The Chicken : Pull up. Pull UP. Don't suck a duck into your turbines. George the Kiwi : AN ALBATROSS. Suck up AN ALBATROSS. Yeah. Movie Title: Chip 'n Dale Rescue Rangers (1989) as Chip / Gadget: Gadget : You know, suddenly the plane seems to handle lighter. Chip : Monty just jumped out! Gadget : Oh. That would account for it. Chip : That was a close one. Are you OK Dale? Dale : Yeah. Luckily it landed on my head. Chip : We're going in there just like we said. Chlordane may have mechanical marvels. Gadget : He does. Chip : He may have fiendish fiends. Dale : He does, he does. Chip : He may even have hundreds of cutthroat, bloodthirsty thugs. Monty : Yup. Them too. Chip : But we've got something he doesn't have. Gadget : Enough sense to get out of here? Monty : Great, Gadget! We're almost there. Hit the brakes! Gadget : Golly, no one said anything about stopping. Chip : Rescue Rangers, away! Gadget : Once I found a perpetual motion machine just lying in the trashcan. Of course, by then it had stopped moving. Gadget : Hop inside, guys, and I'll show you how this thing works. Or at least how it's supposed to work. Monty : Gadget's gone too far this time, Chip. She's got these blinkin' propellers facing the wrong way. Chip : She knows what she's doing, Monterey. I'm sure the Ranger Wing is perfectly safe. Gadget : Oh, darn. I'm always ending up with parts left over! Gadget : We're the Rescue Rangers, a small, but efficient, battalion of do-gooders devoted to helping those in trouble. Would you like to see our news clippings? Gadget : Hi there, I'm Gadget. Oh, you know that already... hmmm... What comes next? Oh, what's your name? Gadget : I'll have this plane ship shape in no time. Well, actually it should be plane shaped, shouldn't it? Pi-rat: I say we make them walk the plank. Jolly Roger: No, we did that last time. Pi-rat: How 'bout we keel haul them? Jolly Roger: No, we just painted the keel. Stormy: We could dress them up like bunnies, and dip them in chocolate. Jolly Roger: I'm afraid that ain't piratical enough, Stormy. Gadget : Well, considering the time of day and all, you could bury us in the sand and wait for high tide to come in. Jolly Roger: A fine idea! Chip : Gadget... Gadget : Oh. Oops. You know I can resist a challenge. [Dale is flying the Ranger Wing] Dale : What's this? Gadget : That's the hover switch. It should turn the Ranger Wing into a helicopter. Chip : Should? Gadget : I don't think you can blame them. After all, we are rodents. Movie Title: George of the Jungle 2 (2003) as Tiger: George : Who's with George? Tiger : Why should we follow you, you care more about your family than us. George : Sure George care about family. Even half of family sleeping through best part of movie. [Ursula snores] George : But you've always been George's brothers and sisters, don't you remember? [motions to monkey] George : We took first steps together. [motions to buffalo] George : And you taught me how to swim. [motions to ape] George : And you were with me first time we read Playape magazine. Movie Title: Hey Arnold! (1996) as Grandma: Grandma : I've got a husband, a grandson, and a boarding house full of people to be responsible for. Arnold : [to himself] This heat's so crazy it's got Grandma acting normal. Grandma : Be as the frog in the pond, Arnold. Mugger: Give me your purse, Granny! Grandma : He can have it. It's just a purse, you know. Movie Title: Freakazoid! (1995) as Debbie Douglas: Douglas Douglas : You know, Duncan, you're the only one who ever *sees* this blue guy. Duncan Douglas : He's REAL. Debbie Douglas : Well, of course he's real to *you* dear, but that's because you're probably insane. Movie Title: House of Mouse (2001) as Daisy / Queen of Hearts: Queen of Hearts : You'll have to go fish for a better deal, because we give the competition the royal flush. Daisy : Table for 101. Donald : Oh no. Max : HOLD IT. Will everybody PLEASE stop fussing over us. I hate to complain, but I asked for us to be left alone and I've never seen so many people in my life. What's next? A marching band? [A marching band is waiting in the lobby] Daisy : Sorry, guys. Your gig's off. Movie Title: Dave the Barbarian (2004) as Fang: [repeated line] Fang : I AM NOT A MONKEY! Movie Title: Superman (1988) as Cyrene: Imp: I kinda liked the honey roasted peanuts. Cyrene : We're not here for peanuts! We're here for Wonder Woman! Cyrene : Fasten your seatbelts... I've never been so humiliated in my life! Cyrene : You trapped me once Hippolyta but never again! Movie Title: The Rugrats Movie (1998) as Charlotte Pickles: Charlotte Pickles : You know what they say: "Born under Venus, look for a..." [phone rings] Charlotte Pickles : Hello? Movie Title: Steven Spielberg Presents... Tiny Toon Adventures (1990) as Babs: Buster: Hi kids. I'm Buster Bunny. Babs : And I'm Babs Bunny. Buster and Babs: No relation. Babs : I'm tired of dating silly, immature little boys. I'd like to meet a sophisticated older guy with a special affinity for rabbits. Babs : This place is supposed to be wild, crazy, and completely out of control! [beat] Babs : Hope I'm not bored. Babs : Pandemonium doesn't reign around here... it pours. Babs : I'm tiny, not toony. I am a human gooney. [Babs is lost in New York] Babs : They'll make a TV movie out of this starring Eve Plumb! 'Babs: Portrait of a Teenage Toon'! Buster: Here's a little ditty. Babs : Ditty what? Buster: Ditty pay you for that joke? Babs : What do you know about Honey? Hamton : Uh... it's sweet, and Winnie the Pooh has a problem with it... Movie Title: Rugrats (1991) as Charlotte Pickles: Charlotte Pickles : Angel, when you don't share, well, it... it won't look good on the application for Harvard. Movie Title: Elvira, Mistress of the Dark (1988) as Anchorwoman: Anchorwoman : Is there anything that could possibly shame you? Elvira : Yeah, [flicks anchorwoman's scarf] Elvira : wearing this out in public might do it. Movie Title: Tiny Toon Adventures: How I Spent My Vacation (1992) as Big Boo / Babs Bunny: Buster Bunny : Babs, grab the life saver! Babs Bunny : Who can think of candy at a time like this? [Byron the Basset Hound saves Babs and Buster by flying] Buster Bunny : Hey, Byron can fly! Babs Bunny : Who knew? Babs Bunny : And here I thought it was Esperanto! Babs Bunny : Why, Buster Bunny, are you falling for me? Buster Bunny : [as they fall down a waterfall] You might say that! Big Boo : [referring to Buster] Look, he's got no pants! Babs Bunny : We've got snappers and crackers and poppers and bangers. We've got them Roman candles, yucky curly snakey things, and the little spinny whirly balls that never work. Babs Bunny : Head toward the light. Babs Bunny : Oh, Buster, I didn't think I'd get a chance to tell you... Buster Bunny : Shh. I feel the same way. Movie Title: Animaniacs (1993) as Hello Nurse / Dot: Dot : Boys. Go fig. Dot : I'm going to hurt my brother badly. Dot : Oh, oh, my heart aches with the sorrow of a thousand scouts. No merit badge. I mourn my loss. Yakko : Say, those acting classes are really paying off. Yakko : We'd love to stay here and count our brain cells as they die one-by-one. Dot : But we can't. Miss Flamiel: Dot, what can you tell me about the great scientists of the nineteenth century? Dot : They're all dead. Miss Flamiel: No no no. Dot : All right. They're all living. Miss Flamiel: No no no. Yakko : Well, now we're getting into philosophy. Dot : Nice decorating. Let me guess, Satan? Dot : I think this uniform needs something; something that says I'm here to destroy you, but with a sense of fun. Arch Bishop : King Yakko, your throne. Wakko : The throne? How do you lift the lid? Dot : Since when do *you* lift the lid? Yakko : Wait a minute. You expect us poor, innocent children to climb up dangerous scaffolding and paint naked people all over a church? Wakko , Yakko , Dot : We'll do it. Yakko : But we're not doing it for art. We're not doing it for the sake of money. No! We're doing it because we love painting naked people. Dot : Do you think this plan will work? Yakko : It better. We don't have any more commercial breaks. Wakko , Yakko , Dot : Be afraid. Be very afraid. Dot : All we know is that we like you. We have no taste, but we like you. Dot : Um, it's not that we wouldn't like to take your survey... Yakko : It's more like we'd rather have dental surgery. Wakko : So what are we going to get Dr. Scratchy? Dot : Ooooooh, how about an outfit from Oedipus Rex Men's Wear? Yakko : Nah, his mom would hate those. Yakko : Call it a hunch, sibs, but I think we've been abducted by aliens. Dot : Aliens? What'll we do? Wakko : Go find the cafeteria? Yakko , Dot : Yeah. Dot : Do you think Scratchy'd like some cologne? Fifi : We have Obsession, Repression, and Ecstacy. Dot : Do you have anything for beginners? Dr. Scratchensniff : Dot, would you care to give it a try? But, I'd like you to make a little curtsey. Dot : Thanks, but I did before I left home. Dot : Don't look down. You might fall and hit your head and die and your brains would leak out alllllll over. Wakko , Yakko , Dot : Wheel of Morality, turn, turn, turn, and tell us the lesson that we should learn. Yakko : Free trip to Tahiti. All: Cheers. [The Warners are singing a Christmas song] Dot : [singing] The stockings were hung so our names clearly showed Wakko : [singing] In the hopes that old Santa would leave a big load. Yakko : [blows a kiss to the audience] Good NIGHT, everybody. Dot : Mr. President? Get to work. Dot : Aliens. Go fig. Wakko , Yakko : We're the Warner brothers. Dot : And the Warner sister. Dot : My five-year mission is to seek out new worlds and make them cuter. Girth Plotz: We meet again, Princess. Dot : That's Princess Angelina Contessa Louisa Francesca Banana Fanna Lay Onna Pile Of Origami the Third. But you can call me Dot. Wakko : Wanna see me make bubbles with my spit? Yakko : Sure do. In fact, that's the theme of our next show. Dot : So don't miss it. Hello Nurse : How come I always get the booby prize? Dot : I'm not touching that one! Dot : Requiem for a Lamb: Mary had a little lamb / With mint jelly. Thank you. Dot : Roses are red, violets are blue / That's what they say, but it just isn't true / Roses are red, and apples are, too / But violets are violet, violets aren't blue / An orange is orange, but Greenland's not green / A pinky's not pink, so what does it mean? / To call something blue when it's not, we defile it / But what the heck, it's hard to rhyme violet. Dot : Jack Sprat could eat no fat, so he became macrobiotic and an enormous pain in the neck. Yakko , Wakko , Dot : Make a Googie! Yakko : [reciting "A Midsummer Night's Dream"] For I am an honest Puck... Dot : [translating] I'm not touching that one! Yakko : Did you know that there's "P.P." on your smock? Dot : Disgusting! Dot : Call me "Dottie", and you die! Dr. Scratchensniff : [showing Dot an inkblot] What do you see here? Dot : I'd say you're not a very good artist. Dr. Scratchensniff : I didn't draw it. Dot : Then whoever did needs to go back to school. Dr. Scratchensniff : No, no. It's an inkblot. Dot : I'll say. Dr. Scratchensniff : It's not supposed to look like anything! Dot : Then you did a very good job. Dr. Scratchensniff : I DIDN'T DRAW IT! Don't you think it looks like a little kitty cat or a butterfly or something? Dot : No. [takes off the inkblot and changes it into a butterfly] Dot : THAT'S a butterfly. Man: That's my sandwich! Dot : You want it back? [sticks out her tongue with "C" food] Man: EWWW! Miss Flamiel: Find your seats! Yakko : [showing his butt] Got my seat. Wakko : [showing his butt] Got mine. Dot : [showing her butt] Here's mine. Yakko : [to Miss Flamiel] Bet you don't have trouble finding yours. Movie Title: Futurama (1999) as Mom / Vyolet: Dwayne : Please, do not be frightened, we're harmless. Vyolet : Hey, I've got three arms. Dwayne : I said "harmless", not "armless". [Leela is about to be sacrificed] Leela : I'm a virgin. Vyolet : Nice try, Leela, but we've all seen Zapp Branagin's web page. Mom : You broke my heart, Hubert. Professor Hubert Farnsworth : And you broke mine. Granted, that was four or five hearts ago. Movie Title: The Simpsons (1989) as Agnes Skinner / Pepi / Billy Corgan / Woman / James Bond / Jimbo Jones / Sunday School Teacher / Clerk / Belle / Jimbo: Billy Corgan : Billy Corgan, Smashing Pumpkins. Homer : Homer Simpson, smiling politely. [Comic Book visits a dating service and grabs all the one-nighter presentation videotapes] Clerk : Are you going to call all those women? Comic Book Guy : No, the tapes will do just fine. Comic Book Guy : Yes, I would like to return your quote-unquote *ultimate* belt. Clerk : I see. Do you a receipt, quote-unquote sir? Comic Book Guy : No, I do not have a receipt. I won it as a door prize at a Star Trek convention, although I find their choice of prize highly illogical, as the average Trekker has no need of a medium-size belt. Clerk : Wow, a fat sarcastic Star Trek fan. You must be a devil with the ladies... gee, I hate to let you down, Casanova, but no receipt, no return. Bart : I'll give you four bucks for it. Comic Book Guy : Very well. I must get back to my comic book store, where I dispense the insults rather than receive them. Agnes Skinner : You failed, Seymour. What is it with you and failure? [Homer is a Blackjack dealer] Ernst Stavro Blofeld: Twenty. Your move, Mr. Bond. James Bond : I'll take a hit, dealer. [Homer deals Bond a card] James Bond : Joker? You're supposed to take these out of the deck. Homer : Oh, sorry, I'll give you another one. [Homer deals Bond another card] James Bond : What's this? "Rules for Draw and Stud Poker"? Ernst Stavro Blofeld: What a pity, Mr. Bond... [Oddjob and Jaws advance on Bond and grab him] James Bond : But... but wait. It was Homer's fault. I can't lose. I never lose. [Oddjob and Jaws drag Bond out of the casino] James Bond : At least tell me your plans for world domination. Ernst Stavro Blofeld: Oh ho ho, I'm not falling for THAT one again. Homer : I'd like your deadliest gun please. Clerk : Aisle 6- Next to the sympathy cards. Pepi : Tell me more. I want to know ALL the constellations. Homer : Well, that one's Jerry, the cowboy. And that big dipper-looking thing is Alan, the cowboy. [Nelson's friends catch him kissing Lisa] Kearney : Aw man. You just kissed a girl. Jimbo Jones : That is so gay. [Students draw pictures in Sunday School] Sunday School Teacher : Ralph, Jesus didn't have wheels. Clerk : Celebrate the independence of your nation by blowing up a small part of it. Agnes Skinner : Seymour, tell these people we're going ahead of them. Principal Skinner : I'm not the principal of the line, mother. Agnes Skinner : And you never will be. Jimbo Jones : Hey look. Milhouse has an earring. [Everyone on the bus starts chanting Milhouse's name in recognition of his newfound coolness] Bart : Hey, if you want cool, check this out. (Singing and dancing) Everybody if you can do the Bart, Man. Shake your body turn it out if you can, can. Do the Bart, Man, yeah. Ralph Wiggum : That is so 1991. Belle : Are you wearing a grocery bag? Homer : I have misplaced my pants. Chief Wiggum : Uh, Mrs. Simpson, I have some bad news. Your husband was found DOA. Marge : Oh my god. He's dead? Chief Wiggum : Oh, I'm sorry. He was DUI. I get those two confused. [a woman walks in] Woman : Uh, hi. My name is Mrs. Phillips. You said my husband was DUI? Chief Wiggum : Uh... talk to one of those officers over there. I'm going to lunch. [at Itchy & Scratchy Land] Announcer: Attention Marge Simpson. Attention Marge Simpson. Your son has been arrested. Woman : I'd be terribly embarrassed if I was that boy's mother. Marge : Mmmmm... Announcer: Attention Marge Simpson, we've also arrested your older, balder, fatter son. Marge : Mmmmmmm... Jimbo : Hey, there's an even dorkier kid on the other side of town with an even better pool. [all the kids jump out, leaving Lisa stood at the bottom of an empty pool] Lisa : Hello? Hello? Oh, how am I gonna get out of here? Lisa's Brain : Well, well, well... look who's come crawlin' back. Agnes Skinner : 'Nuff talk, it's smashin' time. [Homer has joined a crew of "lost souls"] Woman : We wander the seven seas trying to forget. Homer : Forget what? Englishman : Oh, boy, here we go. Woman : My story of jilted love is long and bittersweet. If anyone has to go to the bathroom, go now. I don't want you walking around during my story. Englishman : My story's better, it has tigers. Woman : We're having a free get acquainted session at our resort this weekend. Homer : How much is this free resort weekend? Man : It's free. Homer : And when *is* this weekend? Man : It's this weekend. Homer : Uh-huh, and how much does it cost? Man : Um, it's free. Homer : I see, and when is it? Man : It's this weekend. Homer : And what are you *charging* for this free weekend? Moe : May I have this dance? Woman : [walking away] It's all yours. [Lisa and Marge are watching a soap opera. On TV, a dishevelled man dressed as a priest bursts into the room, surprising the amorous couple inside] Woman : Father McGrath... I thought you were dead. Fr. McGrath: I was! Movie Title: Kingdom Hearts (2002) as The Queen of Hearts: The Queen of Hearts : This girl is the culprit. There's no doubt about it. And the reason is... because I say so, that's why! Alice : That is so unfair! Movie Title: Rugrats in Paris: The Movie - Rugrats II (2000) as Charlotte Pickles: Drew Pickles : I can't believe that Angelica saw that movie last night. Charlotte Pickles : I can't mother and merger at the same time. |
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